Where's the best place to drink polyjuice potion?
In the Changing room.

What's large and hairy with a single fang?
Hargid

What does Harry like on his chips?
HP Sauce

Which ghost works on the Hogwarts Express?
The ticket inspectre

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Harry
Harry who?
Harry up and let us in

A Potions Professor called Snape
Was reluctant to use Sellotape
He once got entraped
In a present he wrapped
And taken ten hours to escape

What's packed with flowers and full of danger?
The Forbidden Florists

Ron: I've just eaten 20 chocolate frogs
Harry: How do you feel?
Ron: Extremely hoppy

What do wizards use to improve the weather?
Sunny Spells

What's huge, leafy and rather pathetic?
The whimpering willow

What do you call Professor McGonagall trapped between two layers of bread?
A sandwitch

Why wasn't Voldermort at the Yule ball?
He had no body to go with.

There once was a Slytherin beater
Who was truly the most dreadful cheater
If another teams chaser
Could clearly outpace her
She'd change into a dragon, and eat her.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Ron
Ron who?
Ron for your life, it's you know who

What do you call a wizard that is a hit with the ladies?
A smooth apparator

What has fourteen legs and can't fly for toffee?
The Hufflepuff Quidditch Team

Where do you find Dumbledore's Army?
Up his sleevey

Why does Dobby keep criticizing himself?
He has low Elf-estem

Which broomstick is the absolute pits?
The direbolt

What lies on the floor of Voldemort's barber's?
The Hair of Slytherin

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Youno
Youno who?
Got it in one

A herbology teacher called Sprout
Had to ask all her students to shout
As over the years
She'd got soil in her ears
And now couldn't get it back out

There once was a Chaser called Randall
Whose temper caused many a scandal
He would loop, swoop and zoom
On his super cool broom
Then lose it and fly of the handle

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Sirius
Sirius who?
Sirius-ly open the door

Which side of Fluffy the three headed dog is it best to stay on?
The outside

Harry: Hedwig's lost her voice
Hermione: Oh dear, is she terribly upset?
Harry: No, she doesn't give a hoot.