## Home Jokes How the Stimulus Plan Will Work

 Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House.One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil."Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about 0: 0 for materials, 0 for my crew and 0 profit for me."The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for 0: 0 for materials, 0 for my crew and 0 profit for me."The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the WhiteHouse official and whispers, ",700."The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"The Chicago contractor whispers back, "00 for me, 00 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence."Done!" replies the government official.And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.
\$x) { if(\$CURRENT_IMAGE == \$img_listing[\$x]) { if(\$x == 0) { //echo "found condition"; \$lastimage = count(\$img_listing) - 1; \$PREV_IMG = \$img_listing[\$lastimage]; \$PREV_STUB= \$stubs[\$lastimage]; \$NEXT_IMG = \$img_listing[\$x + 1]; \$NEXT_STUB= \$stubs[\$x + 1]; } elseif(count(\$img_listing) - 1 == \$x) { //echo "found condition"; \$PREV_IMG = \$img_listing[\$x - 1]; \$PREV_STUB= \$stubs[\$x - 1]; \$NEXT_IMG = \$img_listing[0]; \$NEXT_STUB= \$stubs[0]; } else { //echo "found condition"; \$NEXT_IMG = \$img_listing[\$x + 1]; \$NEXT_STUB= \$stubs[\$x + 1]; \$PREV_IMG = \$img_listing[\$x - 1]; \$PREV_STUB= \$stubs[\$x - 1]; } } \$x++; } \$total_jokes = count(\$stubs) - 1; \$rand_joke = rand(0, \$total_jokes); echo '

<-- PREVIOUS JOKE'; echo '   ' . 'RANDOM JOKE   '; echo 'NEXT JOKE -->'; ?>